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The story so far: Joel Jackson and his wife Anya are traveling throughout Europe in search of a new life. Life has been pretty tough on the two of them as make their way through war-torn Bosnia and Croatia.

Dear Eric’s Blog
I have not heard from you in a while via email so I thoght I’d write your blog instead. My Name is Joel and I’m lost in the Balcans with my wife Anya. We spend some time in post War torn Sarajevo, Bosnia living off cheap beer and a lamb-pork dish called Êivap ËiËi most likely spelled wrong…. cevap cici..whatever. It’s tough living in a city that has no record stores no nightclubs (at least none worth mentioning) and worst of all shitty internet. Even worse is the fact that we have no reason to leave free rent cheap everything. We could deal with all its’ downsides if there were any jobs at all (foreigners or locals, they’re mostly unemployed.) So with that said we left. To the Land of milk and honey Croatia, Zagreb the capital. We’ve been here for a few days now and have been feverishly looking for an aparment. And wouldn’t you know it, there’s a great record store, lots of nightclubs, high speed internet….but No apartments (at least none worth mentioning.) Oh, and Job Prospects look great. Now with our hotel bill climbing faster than Bosnia’s National debt, and the fact that immigration requires you to have an address we’re facing the possibility of going Back to Bosnia to make a new plan. Oh the Irony of it all.
 
Smell ya later,
Joel

You’ve never seen anything like this. Your favourite rock videos from the past converted to movable ASCII and set to the MIDI version of the song. Almost as good as ASCII porn, but not quite.

_, _, _, _ _ __, _, _, _ _
/ \ (_ / ` | | |_) / \ / ` |_/
|~| , ) \ , | | | \ \ / \ , | \
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Not only is Mason my friendster, he has a weblog of his very own. I’m so proud of him I could just fucking gush. He just started it so whether or not the motherfucker updates it as consistently as I do will be known in time. So go visit it, write something in his comments and boost his self-esteem. While you’re there, check out the bizarre photos he’s found on Ebay. Harrowing stuff, indeed.

Soldier on, fancy lad.

Show & Tell Music is a website dedicated to archiving and displaying bizarre thrift store album cover art. From spaced-out stereophonic recordings to easy-listening jazz with sexy girly covers. It has it all. Without even thinking I managed to waste a good hour going through most of them. A really, really good site and well worth checking out.

No witty caption needed

Enjoy the pathetic and downright disturbing images of this mustache contest. Contestants are just based on a variety of criteria. Some of the photo’s are so good it makes me want to grow one.

Who wants a mustache ride?

On the sidebar there’s a new entry called iTunes. What this does is display the last 5 songs being played on my computer. It involves a rather precarious mixture of Javascript, XML, and an application called Kung-Tunes. Enjoy. Kudos to Mason for helping iron out the bugs.

I can barely remember my name at the best of times so how am I supposed to remember my phone number. Well, I don’t have to worry about that any longer thanks to the Verizon Vanity Number Search. Here are some of the results it came up for with my number.

ALI-3-HAM , ALG-3-HAN , ALG-3-HAM , CLIE-IBO , CLIE-IBO , CLIE-IAN , CLIE-HAN , CLIE-HAN , CLIE-HAM , CLIE-HAM , CLIE-GCM , CLIE-GAO , CLIE-GAN , ALIE-HAM , ALIE-GAN , ALIDIA-6 , ALI-EGAN , ALI-EGAN , ALI-DIAO , CLIE-426 , ALIE-426

Hey baby, reach me at ALI-3-HAM.

Update: This website does the same thing but comes up with better results.

The Fellowship Baptist Creation Science Fair is an annual event in which kids compete in a strange mixture of theology and science. Full disclosure: I have never been able to understand the entire notion of creation science having never really grown up in a religious environment. While I can respect both faith and science, they should be kept as separate as me and a bottle of wine. Be sure to check out the winners with such entries as “Women Were Designed For Homemaking” and “Thermodynamics Of Hell Fire”. Somewhere angels are crying.

Uncle Steve despite the resemblance is not a monkey

Sweet Jesus! What the hell is this thing?

While it’s difficult for me to point out the shortcomings of other people, I can’t help but inform you of the song stylings of Wing. Wing earnestly warbles her way through Carpenters songs as well as various Andrew Lloyd Webber songs. Her heart is in the right place, but her voice is from another planet altogether.

Hi, I am Wing! I immigrated to New Zealand with my family about ten years ago from Hong Kong. I have been learning singing in New Zealand and I do performances in Rest Homes and Hospitals and occasionally promotional concerts as I go along.

A for Effort. W for Wing.

If you ever need advice of how to deal with life’s awkward situations, you’ve come to the right place. The University of Minnesota has put up a webpage featuring of searchable database of Social Hygiene Posters from the past century.

The Hero Machine is a really interesting website where you get to create a super-hero. Pretty self explanatory and lots of fun. Here’s my hero, Loverman. Loverman charms women worldwide with his guile and wit and that fancy bowler. His superpower is to failingly hit on women faster than any man alive and subsequently get turned down faster than any man alive. Go Loverman!

How do you like my leggings?

I don’t watch a lot of television. No, not because of self-righteousness but rather because I don’t have cable, digital cable, or satellite. No, my one channel comes through the air and into my crappy TV’s antenna.

I managed to catch an episode of Kenny Vs. Spenny while waiting for a TV show about children of rock stars to start. Kenny Vs. Spenny is quite possible the best show on CBC right now.

The Premise: two guys who are best friends yet constantly annoy the shit out of each other because of conflicting personalities compete weekly in a challenge. This isn’t no Survivor or American Idol bullshit. No, they do dumb stuff. The episode I watched was “Who is the sanest?”. Both Kenny and Spenny went to a series of psychologists to determine who more insane than the other. Other contests in the future include “Who will use their arms first?” and “Who makes the most convincing woman?”. Comedy fucking gold.

The website features bios of both Kenny and Spenny, competitions, clips of the show, and freebies. Check it out. The show airs weekly on CBC every Tuesday at 5:30PM. Check your local listings for exact times though.

Seeing as we won’t be traveling at the speed of light any time soon, you can enjoy how things will look as you approach light speed. The Australian National University relativistic visualization project has used supercomputers to simulate what we might see in a world where the effects of Einstein’s theory of special relativity are everyday experiences. Included for your enjoyment are images, flash presentations and a PDF describing the theory. Science indeed

Punch it, Chewie!

Robert likes ninjas. He really, really likes them. And while I could describe to you how cool he thinks they are, I can describe it as well as he can.

Ninjas can kill anyone they want!  Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don’t even think twice about it.  These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time.  I heard that there was this ninja who was eating at a diner.  And when some dude dropped a spoon the ninja killed the whole town.  My friend Mark said that he saw a ninja totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. And that’s what I call REAL Ultimate Power !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Be sure to check out the scripts for various ninja movies he has planned. Most of them involve an uppercut to the balls followed by the ninja waling on an electric guitar.

Someone has made a movie based on one of the scripts. You must watch it.

Weekly screenshot

I always did wonder what those things really were for.

Softys. I have no clue or wish to. I think i’m even more sick now.